Full of Hope
by cherrystop
Summary: Now, as his baby blue eyes lock with mine, I feel reassured. As if this year is going to be fine, as if nothing bad is going to happen. The positive possibilities become endless as I hold my gaze, and he holds his.
1. Chapter 1

**KATNISS**

It's rainy days like these that I just want to go outside and dance. I would feel so free, and after a long time, happy. Before the unmentionable occurred, when it rained, my sister Primrose used to come outside with me in the rain, and I would spin her around. My mother and father would waltz with smiles in their faces, and we all would be laughing as the rain poured.

That was a long time ago, and I've learned that you shouldn't depend on the past.

I can't help it, though. The rain reminds me of what my family used to have, and what my family will never have.

We used to have my father, until he died in a mine explosion. That was seven years ago. I'm 18 now. My little sister, who was 7 when he died, understood one thing: our father was gone, and we'd never get him back. Little did we know that we would soon loose our mother too.

Our mother lost all the life she had in her. She was despondent and depressed, and we had to force her to eat. Slowly, she began to cooperate and help around the house. I went to the woods illegally to hunt for food using the bow and arrows my dad had made, and Prim made milk using her goat.

Now, enough of all that depressing stuff. Because today, I'm feeling something that I've never felt before.

It almost seems foreign to me…

While I walk to school with Prim, I recognize the feeling.

I feel hopeful. I don't know why.

Maybe it's because it's the first day of spring. Maybe it's because I saw a flower so beautiful, it brought tears to my eyes. And maybe, just maybe, it's because I just saw Peeta Mellark, the boy with the bread, with eyes so blue, that I could drown in them.

I owe Peeta. After my father's death, my mom was uncooperative. We has no money and the family was beginning to starve. Peeta saved our lives, just by giving me two loaves of burnt bread.

Desperately, I went outside in the rain, trying to sell our old clothes with no good luck. Then, Peeta came outside. He noticed me and my terrible condition, and instead of giving the burnt bread to the pigs, he gave the bread to me. Because of his life-saving act, I owe my life to him.

Now, as his baby blue eyes lock with mine, I feel reassured. As if this year is going to be fine, as if nothing bad is going to happen. The positive possibilities become endless as I hold my gaze, and he holds his.

I feel a tug on my arm, and I look down at Prim.

She smiles at me knowingly, and in reply I roll my eyes.

"C'mon, let's get you to class, Little Duck."

I look up to see if the boy with the bread is still there, and as I had not expected, he stands there, watching me.

I look away quickly, and walk Prim to her class.

As I run to my class, I pass Peeta, and notice that his mouth is tilted up in a slight smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: If you're thinking, ****_Hey, I felt like I've read this before_****, it's probably because you have. I stopped writing this story like a year ago because I was so busy. I deleted the first version I had, though. The first three chapters are mainly the same as the first version, but I'm adding and deleting a few deets here and there. I think in the first version, Peeta and Prim were planning on making Katniss enter their school talent show or something. But I felt like if I wrote something that had a talent show in it, it'd be too cliché****and common, so… yeah. Oh, and sorry for any grammar mistakes, misspelled words, etc., and also Suzanne Collins owns Katniss and Peeta and all dem other awesome potatoes.**

* * *

**KATNISS**

After yesterday's eye interaction (I don't know what to call it, so that's what I'm sticking with), I've been looking forward to seeing the boy with the bread.

Right now I am hunting. We're running low on food, so I'm planning on getting some squirrels to trade with the wealthier people in my area…

And Peeta, I realize, is part of those wealthy people.

But that doesn't matter… right?

Sighing, I jump off a tree and duck under the wiring of the electric fence that was currently off.

I walk to the mayor's house and trade with his daughter, Madge. Then, I go to Greasy Sae, a well-known lady from the Hob. The Hob is our black market, and it's the way I get supplies for my family. We trade, and finally, I decide to go the baker's house.

And the baker's son is…

Peeta.

I take a deep breath and ring the doorbell.

No one answers the door.

I ring the doorbell again, but no one answers it.

I sigh and start walking home.

_It's okay_, I think. _At least you didn't get to embarrass yourself._ But some part of me is wishing that someone (hopefully Peeta) had opened the door.

I look up at the sky and notice the gray clouds that are forming above. I keep walking, praying that it wouldn't rain. I don't know what I would do in the rain: dance or cry.

Soon though, I feel a drop of rain on my face. I try to walk faster; the urge to dance and cry is starting to slow me down.

The rain is coming down faster now, and I keep my head down so no one passing by can see the tears that were threatening to fall.

_THUNK_.

"Ow!" I say, putting my hand to my forehead.

"I'm so sor— Katniss?" A person says, and I look up into the eyes that have been on my mind since yesterday.

"Peeta?" I ask.

"What're you doing out here in the rain?" he asks. "Get under the umbrella, you'll get sick." he demands.

I do as he says and answer his question with a statement. "You know, I could ask you the same question," I say, raising an eyebrow.

He looks at me and laughs. "You're right," he replies. He takes in my appearance and notices my hunting bag. "Were you trading?"

"Yes," I answer. "I was going to trade with your father, but no one opened the door when I rang the doorbell."

"Well, we can trade now," he says. "If you want to, I mean," he quickly adds, and I find myself getting lost in his eyes.

"Sure," I mumble, as a blush creeps onto my face. Did he notice me staring at him?

"C'mon," he says with a smile.

I follow him to his house, and give him the squirrel when we reach his house.

"Here's your squirrel," I say.

As he takes the squirrel, his hands brush mine, and I feel a spark.

His smile grows even wider, and he welcomes me inside.

"Are you sure?" I ask. I've heard rumors of how his mother didn't like kids from the Seam, which is a nickname for where I live.

"Yeah, of course. No one except us is here." he says, and I end up blushing again.

"So, uh, where 's your family?" I ask stupidly.

"They're at Delly's house, they won't be here for another hour." Peeta answers.

"Oh," I reply. People say that Delly's family and Peeta's family are very close friends. I didn't realize how close they were until now. Does this mean that Peeta and Delly have a relationship?

Why would I care if Peeta had a girlfriend? I'm really over thinking this.

"Over thinking what?" Peeta asks.

Did I say that out loud?

"Uh, I was over thinking… actually, wondering—" I pause. What am I wondering about? "I was wondering what you're going to give me, because, you know, we're trading." I finish blabbering.

Peeta doesn't seem to notice how awkward feel. "I was thinking about giving you some of these cookies." He puts a box of cookies on the counter, and I gasp.

"Those are the cookies—" I begin to say, but Peeta interrupts me.

"That Prim looks at whenever she passes our bakery?"

I nod, speechless.

"Yeah, I've noticed how she looks at these. But someone," he says, pointing at me, "always pulls her away."

"Only because we have to get home," I say, defending myself.

He laughs, but suddenly stops. "Every time you pass the bakery, you _have_ to go home?" he asks in a soft voice.

My mouth is suddenly dry. "I— I have to. Or else she'll just stand there and look…" I trail off, and notice how close we are to each other.

From here, I can see how the blue in his eyes darkens as it nears the pupil.

"Look at…?" he says in a low voice, and it's clear that we're not talking about Prim anymore.

I try to speak, but no words are coming out.

When I don't respond, Peeta grabs my shoulders. "Katniss, I—"

He's cut off by the sound of footsteps and we both freeze.

I want to turn and look at who is there so badly, but the bewildered expression on Peeta's face tells me not to.

_Please don't be her, please don't be her_, I repeat in my head.

Finally, after what seemed like years, Peeta says one word.

"Mom?"


	3. Chapter 3

**KATNISS**

Slowly, I turn around to face Peeta's mother.

She glares at me with such hatred, I try not to cringe away from her.

"What is _she_ doing here?" She spits out the words with so much disgust, I begin to wonder what I did to her to earn this kind of treatment.

Peeta quickly composes himself to answer.

"We were just trading, Mother."

"'Just trading?'" She says, clearly irritated by the answer.

"Yes ma'am," I say. "I'll just go—"

"_You_," she demands, "will stay here until I tell you to go."

I nod, unable to do anything else.

"No, Katniss, go." Peeta says, nudging me towards the open door. I look at him with bewilderment. "It's okay, you can go."

"I—"

"I can handle this. She's my mother." He says.

Suddenly, I remember a younger Peeta with a bruise on his face. I want to stay behind so badly, and protect him from this crazy woman.

But the look on his face is begging me to leave.

Peeta's mother is looking at us, and she grins mockingly.

"Yes, Katniss. Peeta can 'handle this'." She begins to cackle like a maniac, and I nod.

"Okay… I hope you like the squirrel." I say weakly, looking at Peeta's baby blue eyes.

Though his facial expression is passive, he gulps slowly with fear, and nods.

"We will. Bye." he replies.

"See you at school." I say, and his blue eyes light up with what I think is…

Hope.

As soon as I'm outside, I take a deep breath. I can already hear Peeta's mother's angry shrieks and yells.

"What… with… her? You… never… her!"

Sighing, I run through the rain to my house.

* * *

"Katniss, where were you?" My mom asks, clearly concerned.

"I'm sorry Mom, I was out trading." I reply.

Prim comes skipping into the kitchen. "What'd you get, what'd you get?" She asks.

"I got some primroses for you," I say, tickling Prim, "and strawberries, and some medicine."

My mom smiles. "Thank goodness! I've been running low on medicine, so many people have been getting sick."

"I also got something else…" I bring out a pin that Greasy Sae traded with me. I give it to Prim.

The bird in flight, a mockingjay, is captured on the pin. The mockingjay is the result of the breeding of a mockingbird and blue jay. The government created them to find out secrets, but once everyone found out about the birds, the mockingjays lost their purpose and were release into the wild. Instead of dying though, they unexpectedly reproduced.

"It's a mockingjay pin. It reminded me of you; beautiful and innocent." I say.

"Oh, Katniss, it's so pretty! Thank you!" Prim exclaims. My mother looks at me and gives me a thumbs up.

"I should go change, I'm soaking wet from the rain." My mother and Prim notice my condition and let me go change.

I come back out in dry clothes. "What's for dinner?" I ask, my stomach grumbling.

Prim giggles. "Your tummy talks a lot," she says. She then makes sounds that are supposed to sound like my rumbling stomach, but her attempt sounds more like a whale.

Her sounds cause all of us to laugh so hard we're clutching our stomachs.

Finally, my mom manages to say, "We're having goat stew." She places three bowls on the table.

"Yum…" I say as soon as I take a sip of the stew.

"I second that," Prim says.

After dinner, we all go to the bedroom, and sleep on our respective beds. My mother sleeps on one bed, and Prim and I sleep on the other. For a poor family like us, this dinner is described as a luxurious meal.

Before I go to sleep, a special someone with blond hair and blue eyes pops up in my mind. Why did Peeta want me to leave, even if he too was scared of his mother? Was it because she might have hit me, just like she did to Peeta when he was younger?

These questions are swirling around as I drift off to sleep.

* * *

It's still raining outside when hear a sound from the window near my bed. I ignore it for a few minutes until I realize that it sounds like a knock.

I untangle myself from Prim and walk over to the window with caution. I can't really see anything outside because of the darkness and rain, but a gleam of blue tells me who it is. I slide the window open as silently as possible and whisper.

"Peeta?" I ask.

"Hey, Katniss!" He whispers joyfully, as if what he was doing was normal.

"What are you doing here?" Then, remembering his mother, I ask, "Are you okay?"

I can't see the expression on his face, but the tone of his voice changes.

"Uh, yeah. I'm fine." He replies.

"Why don't you come inside? It's cold and rainy outside."

"Yeah, that'd be nice." He begins to climb inside the room through the window, and I stop him.

"We have a door, Peeta." I say, smiling at his ridiculous idea.

"Oh, right."

A few seconds later I hear a slight knock on our door. I close the window and sprint to the door.

"Hello again, Miss Katniss Everdeen," he greets.

I roll my eyes. "Get inside Peeta."

Not wanting to on the lights, I find a match and light it. Peeta looks at the flame, and then at me.

He looks away and observes the kitchen. Then, he walks over to the dinner table and puts something on it.

"You forgot the cookies." He says.

"You came here," I say, "just to give me cookies?"

"Yeah," he answers, shrugging.

"You know, you could have given it to me tomorrow at school." I say, looking at the cookies with astonishment.

"I know, but I wanted to see you." His statement brings a blush to my face, and I look away.

I try to make his face out in the little light that we have, and I ask him another question.

"So, how do you know where I live?"

This question obviously takes him off guard. "Uh… I…" Finally, after a moment, he says, "That's for me to know and you to find out."

I roll my eyes again and walk over to him. After a look at his face, I suck in my breath. There's a bruise forming on his left cheek.

"What happened?" I ask. I reach out and touch the bruise.

"My brothers and I were wrestling, and one of them managed to get me in the face." He says.

I almost believe him. The way he says the lie is so convincing that I want to say, "Okay."

But I don't. Instead, I angrily say, "Did she do this?"

He takes my hand off of his face and holds it in his hands. "Katniss, it's okay. I told you I was fine."

So she did hurt him.

"It's not fine to me," I whisper harshly. I realize that what I just said is the truth. At the same time, questions arise in my head. When did Peeta matter so much to me? Why do I want to go and give his mother a taste of her own medicine?

"Katniss, look at me." He demands.

Again, I'm a little late on realizing just how close we are to each other. When I look into his eyes, his eyes tell me what I want to hear: everything will be okay.

"It's just—"

Peeta completes my sentence. "Not fair?"

Embarrassed, I look away.

"Don't be embarrassed. I think that all the time." He says.

"I don't want you to get hurt because of me." I say quietly.

"I know you don't," he says, "but it's okay."

"No, it's actually not." One look at his face tells me that he's not going to let me feel guilty about what happened to home. To change the subject, I squint and look at the clock. Peeta looks at the clock too, and his eyes widen.

"I better get home." He says.

"Yeah, you should." _Even though I don't want you to go_, I think in my head.

"Bye Katniss." He leans down and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Bye." I say quietly, numb from his unexpected kiss.

I'm still standing in the kitchen after I hear the door close with my hand on my cheek.

How did a girl like me and boy like him get so close in a day?

* * *

**Yo it's like one in the morning…**

**I'm going to sleep.**


	4. Chapter 4

**KATNISS**

The next day at school, I see Peeta in the hallway as I make my way to my locker. He doesn't notice me at first.

"Are you coming to the party?" One of his friends asks.

"Actually… I'm not. I'm busy." Peeta replies.

I pause for moment and continue walking.

"Really? Are you going out with a girl or something?" his friend teases.

His friends laugh.

"Maybe I am," Peeta says. Something begins to burn inside of me. Who is this girl? I turn around to get to my first period, English, and find that he's watching me.

"How you scored a girl with that bruise on your face, I dunno. Your brothers must be really good at wrestling," another friend says.

I flinch at the lie and Peeta looks away.

As I walk away, Peeta says, "Yeah… we should get to class."

* * *

I sit down in my seat once I enter the class. I'm about to let out an exhale of relief when I see Peeta walking into the room. Crap. I forgot he had English with me.

Peeta usually sits in the back of the class with his friends, so I don't have to worry about seeing that bruise.

I take my water bottle out and take a drink. I'm about to swallow, but something feels off. I look around for a moment. To the left was the wall, in front of me was the board, and behind me was a girl that no one really likes talking to because she always corrects you, and then to my right was Peeta, and—

What the hell. _Peeta_? Why was he sitting here?

My eyes widen and I almost spit out the water that's in my mouth. He's sitting in the seat like he was made for it.

"Do you have something to say, Katniss?" Peeta asks me with a raised eyebrow. One of his friends snickers.

I swallow the water. I'm about to say something rude, but my eyes find the bruise, and I can't help but think, _He got that because of me, because I came to the bakery._

I look at his blue eyes. "You should put some ice on that bruise."

The teacher starts the lesson and I stare at the board for the rest of class.

* * *

I let out a frustrated sigh when I realize that I'm going to be late for math. My English teacher had wanted to talk to me about an assignment, and he took longer than I had expected. I'm grabbing my math binder from my locker when someone covers my eyes.

Instinct kicks in and soon enough I've pinned the person to the lockers.

"What the hell do you think— Peeta?"

"Jeez, Katniss, you freaked me out!" He exclaims.

"_I _freaked _you_ out, seriously? You're the one who covered my eyes!"

"I wanted to surprise you!"

"Well, mission accomplished." I say tiredly.

Peeta sighs. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's okay." I glance at his bruise and then wince. "I didn't hurt you, did I? I'd hate to be responsible for another bruise."

To my surprise, he smiles, but it disappears quickly. "No, I just wanted to tell you to stop looking at my bruise like… _that_. This isn't the first time I've gotten a bruise, you know."

I frown. "Like what?"

"Like… like _that_. Like… you care," he mumbles. "I've gotten plenty of bruises before from wrestling and you didn't look at me like this."

"Um…" I try to figure out what to say. Was I supposed to shrug and say, _Maybe I do care!_ or was I just supposed to be like, _Whaaaat noooo!_

"It's just that this bruise is my fault. You got all those other bruises because of your stupidity," I finally reply.

He looks away for a moment, as though he was hoping for another answer. "Oh. Well, we should get to class. I told the teacher I needed to go to the restroom," he says with a shrug.

"Right. But you go in first. People might think things if we go in together."

"Do you care if people 'think things', Katniss?" He asks.

I find myself drowning in his eyes. _I don't give two craps if people think things. _"Can you just go in first?"

Peeta grins and walks to the classroom's closed door. I roll my eyes when he winks at me before he opens the door and walks inside.

* * *

After school ends, I go to the school's library. There are a lot of books on the history of our country, Panem, that are actually somewhat interesting.

However, I'm not here for the books. I'm here to tutor students who need help in, well, almost all subjects. I tutor for about and hour or two, depending on my schedule and how many people need help. Any method of payment is acceptable as long as it can help my family; money, food, medicines— I'll take it.

Once I settle down in the library, a sixth grader named Collin comes up to me and asks me to help him in math.

"Sure, what do you need help on?" I ask. He shows me his problem and it takes me about an hour to help him understand it.

"You're supposed to subtract _x_ from both sides and—"

"That guy is watching you." Collin says.

I frown. "Who is?"

"Over there, the one with blond hair." He points to the library's entrance, and sure enough, Peeta's looking at me expectantly with a math textbook in his hand.

I roll my eyes. "Ignore him. He's not important, this is."

Fifteen minutes later, Collin gives me something in a paper bag— I guess whatever's in the plastic bag is his way of paying me— and a hug. "Thanks, Katniss."

I smile. "No problem, kiddo."

I wait for a minute and see if anyone else needs help. When no one comes forward, I walk over to Peeta. "What are you doing here?"

"I heard you tutor. You see, we have a math test this Friday, and—"

"You better not be asking me for help in math, Peeta."

He's caught off-guard. "Um, why not?"

"You got, like, a 98 on your last math test. And you got A's on all your other tests too. People should be coming to you for tutoring," I say.

Peeta's lips quirk. "How'd you know that?"

"I— I pay attention to things," I stutter.

He looks at me with… an expression I can't put a name on. It looks somewhat like longing. Sort of… wistful.

I clear my throat. "Anyway, I have to get home. So… bye."

"Wait! Can I walk you home?" He sounds surprised at his own words.

"Uh, sure…"

We step outside of the library and Peeta immediately starts asking questions.

"So, where's your sister? Does she walk home alone?"

"I walk home with her when I don't have anything after school. And I think she can walk alone without getting hurt. I mean, who would deliberately hurt Prim, you know? She's so sweet."

Peeta smiles. "Yeah, I don't think I could ever say no to her."

I laugh. "Believe me, it's really hard for me to say no too. A few years back, she found this hideous cat with muddy-yellow eyes, and guess what she named him."

"What?"

"_Buttercup_."

We start to crack up.

After we finish laughing Peeta says, "She finds a way to make the ugly things beautiful. That's a gift that many people don't have."

"I know. And when she found that cat, I knew she was going to ask me if we could keep it. I said no at first, but once she cried, I had to say yes."

Peeta studies me. "She's lucky to have a sister like you."

I blush. "I, uh, thanks."

Awkward silence.

Then, "What's in the bag?"

"Hmm?"

"The bag the boy gave you."

"Oh, I don't know. I'm guessing it's food," I reply.

"Food?"

"Yeah. If the students I tutor can't pay me by money, they pay me buy food or medicine, even. And as long as it helps my family, I'll take it."

"That's amazing. You're amazing," he says after a moment.

"Thanks," I hope I'm not blushing. "Sometimes I feel selfish though, because I'm still taking something from them for my family."

"That's not selfish. It's called survival."

I sigh.

"Are you gonna check what's in the bag later or can I start the drum roll?" He asks.

I laugh. "You can start the drum roll."

"Okay, drum roll!" Since he doesn't have anything to use as drum, he makes drum sounds that end immediately once he sees what's in my hand.

It's a loaf of bread. Collin gave me a loaf of bread.

Peeta gave me a loaf of bread too, a long time ago.

I speak up. "I never got to say thank you that day." He'd given me food that had saved my family. And now that I remember it, his mom had slapped him in front of me too. Great, I was responsible for another one of Peeta's bruises.

"You don't have to. I'd do it again."

"No, I do," my voice cracks. "You saved my family. You saved our lives." I whisper.

Peeta doesn't say another word. He pulls me to him and I wrap my arms around him. He holds me like that for some time, and for the first time since my father's death, I feel safe.

I pull away from his embrace. "I'll walk home by myself from here. Go home, Peeta."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He turns around to walk home.

"Wait," I say.

I walk over to him and kiss him on his cheek, right on the bruise.

"Thank you."

* * *

**Yayyyy, I hope y'all are happy with this chapter.**

**Goin' to sleep now, cuz it's 12:30 AM and I am hella tired yo.**

**Buenas noches, mis amigos.**


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